Simple Minded Weekly Recap-ITATION! – 11/22/2019


TREES!  LIGHT PARADES!  LITTLE TRAINS!  ICE!  YES, IT IS TIME FOR DOWNTOWN WINTERFEST! – The annual Downtown El Paso winter festival is back again this year and it is bigger than ever.  The downtown event that expanded on the tree lighting started back in the late ‘90s, by my estimates, and it has slowly become one of the better family traditions in the area.  This year the decades old tree lighting ceremony will be accompanied by the now traditional light parade.  In addition, the Downtown Winterfest will continue through the new year with vendors, an ice skating rink and a little train near the Plaza De Los Lagartos festival area.  So embrace the cold and head to Downtown El Paso and welcome even colder temperatures.  (

I THANK THE NATURALLY OCCURRING LITHIUM IN THE GREATER PASO DEL NORTE REGION’S WATER SUPPLY FOR THE LOW LEVELS OF DEPRESSION.  SWEET, SWEET LITHIUM – A new study has found that El Paso has the second lowest rate of depression among mid-size cities in the United States and is in the top 20 overall among all cities.  Though the study isn’t part of a major scientific research project, it’s still nice to see El Paso come among the top-tier in lists like this.  There are many factors that contribute to El Paso’s good mental health ratings, but I’m just going to give 100% credit to the lithium in the water supply.  Thank you, lithium.  (

LET’S BUILD A CHIHUAHUAN DESERT EXHIBIT INSIDE OF A ZOO THAT’S IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CHIHUAHUAN DESERT! [MIND BLOWN] THE EL PASO ZOO IS THE MOST META ZOO IN THE UNIVERSE – Although at first glance it seems a bit absurd that a zoo in the Chihuahuan Desert spent millions on a Chihuahuan Desert exhibit, the fact that the exhibit will focus on preservation of local species makes it all worth it.  There are many species in our surrounding desert – including Mexican grey wolves, mountain lions, jaguars and parrots – that are threatened and some that are practically extinct in certain areas and this new zoo section will bring awareness to all the amazing animals that live in the desert and perhaps create an opportunity to re-introduce these species back into the wild.  They also have a Copper Canyon themed rope course so you can make a fool of yourself when you realize just how out of shape you really are.  Let’s protect the Chihuahuan Desert.  (


IF EBOLA DOESN’T KILL YOU IN THE DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC OF CONGO, THE MEASLES WILL AT LEAST FUCK YOU UP A LITTLE MORE.  SEE KIDS, THAT’S WHY VACCINES ARE IMPORTANT – More than twice as many people have died from the measles virus as have died from the Ebola outbreak in DR Congo in this year alone.  Around 250,000 people have been infected this year alone and the epidemic has been compounded by a shortage of vaccines and attacks on medical personnel.  If there’s a silver lining it’s that if the Ebola virus didn’t destroy DR Congo, no virus known to man will ever cripple it completely.  (

HONG KONG IS STILL A MESS AND IT LOOKS LIKE CHINA IS JUST GOING TO LET THE WHOLE COMMUNITY IMPLODE AS IT SLOWLY TAKES IT OVER FROM WITHIN – The unrest continues in Hong Kong as elections loom next week.  Protesters are being arrested, including young students, and it looks like China is more than happy to let the territory tear itself apart as it gradually turns it into official China province #1194583.  And regardless of the results of the election, the world will just wag their finger and won’t do anything else because trying to force China to do the right thing is as pointless an endeavor as getting Russia or America to do the right thing and not be selfish.  (

HAPPY THANKSGIVING! – It’s Thanksgiving next week, so have fun with your family that you only see once or twice a year and try not to get too wasted and argue with your loved ones.  And if you’re going to the Sun Bowl Thanksgiving parade be safe and be on the lookout for the Dragons Of Thrones float by the Delta Academy – this one wasn’t built with taxpayer money!  See that, El Paso County government?  (


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