Simple Minded Weekly Recap-ITATION! – 05/24/2019

PASO DEL NORTE-CENTRIC NEWS

HOMELESSNESS IN EL PASO HAS DROPPED FROM PREVIOUS YEARS.  I GUESS ALL THE HOMELESS WENT TO LOS ANGELES OR SOMEWHERE ELSE – Various local charities and organizations did their annual “point in time” count of the city’s homeless population and have found that the number has dropped by more the 300 people since a similar “point in time” count in 2017.  Overall, the count found that at any given moment there are 183 homeless living on the streets and 626 people in shelters or transitional housing in El Paso.  These numbers are even more staggering considering that they occurred during the mild period in El Paso’s weather.  One can only imagine the number of people living on the streets substantially goes down during the Paso Del Norte region’s trademark Hot-As-Hell-Summers and Colder-Than-Lucifer’s-Teets-Winters.  But while these low numbers are a sign of improvement, more can be done to help the homeless population in El Paso and hopefully lower the numbers throughout the region.  It’s highly improbable to get to zero homelessness in a large city, but we sure can try.  Kudos to everyone involved in the local charities and organizations that are tackling this important problem.  (cbs4local.com)

TURNS OUT THERE IS AN EL PASO ANIMAL HALL OF FAME AND SUNNY THE SEA LION IS THE NEWEST INDUCTEE.  HOW COME I WASN’T TOLD OF THIS BEFORE? – One of the hidden treasures at the El Paso Zoo is the newly renovated El Paso Animal Hall of Fame sponsored by the El Paso Veterinary Medical Association.  The newest inductee will be Sunny the Sea Lion who lived at the El Paso Zoo from 1986 until his death in 2012.  Sunny brought joy to thousands of zoo visitors over the years and was the face of various awareness campaigns created by the El Paso Zoo.  He was a great ambassador for the area and he deserves to be in the El Paso Animal Hall of Fame.  You will live on forever, Sunny.  (cbs4local.com)

NEON DESERT IS BACK THIS YEAR.  NOW ALL THE GIRLS WILL PUT ON THEIR BEST BIKINI-CENTERED COSTUMES AND PARADE AROUND WHILE PRETENDING TO CARE ABOUT MUSIC.  LIKEWISE, GUYS WILL PRETEND TO CARE ABOUT MUSIC WHILE STARING AT GIRLS WEARING THONGS ON THE STREET – The Neon Desert Music Festival is back this weekend and has moved a few blocks over to a new location in Downtown that won’t affect too many local businesses.  So get your best thong/outfit ready and prepare to parade around downtown while pretending you care about music.  This year they have music playing trolleys – that you can ignore while you walk around in a thong!  (elpasoheraldpost.com)

REST OF THE WORLD-CENTRIC NEWS

YOU TRIED YOUR BEST, THERESA MAY.  HAVE A COOKIE.  NOW BRING ON THE NEXT IDIOT TO TRY TO MAKE A BENEFICIAL BREXIT DEAL WITH NO LEVERAGE WHATSOEVER – Brexit was a pretty stupid idea and now the British people can either swallow their pride and have another referendum to determine if they should remain in the EU or proceed ahead with a no-deal Brexit that will be much more devastating to the UK than to the European Union.  Whatever path they take, the only thing that is certain is that Theresa May will no longer be the Prime Minister assigned to the fool’s errand of trying to negotiate a beneficial Brexit deal with Europe.  Even though her plan failed to get enough votes multiple times, she still kept on coming with the same exact plan in a different gift box.  So the fact that she finally realized her actions were pointless and resigned shows how hopeless the process to get a Brexit deal has become.  Let’s see who volunteers to be the next sacrificial lamb/prime minister.  (bbc.com)

MOUNT EVEREST HAS PRACTICALLY BECOME A MAINSTREAM TOURIST ATTRACTION COMPLETE WITH LONG LINES TO SCALE THE MOUNTAIN.  STILL, IT’S DANGEROUS IF YOU AREN’T EXPERIENCED AND A DEADLY ENDEAVOR FOR THOSE THAT AREN’T FULLY PREPARED – Seven people, including four in the past few days, have died while scaling Mount Everest during the current climbing season that has been plagued by a narrow climbing window due to the weather.  The situation has created gridlock on the mountain as everyone tries to climb during the periods when the weather is decent and thus large lines form as people attempt to climb and descend the peak.  So any medical emergency when you’re stuck in line is a guaranteed death sentence.  Maybe they should increase the fees to enter the climbing zone and make everyone get a medical evaluation before going up – they can keep Everest from becoming a full blown tourist trap and maybe prevent a few deaths.  (reuters.com)

BACK IN MY DAY, CATS WORKED ON THE RAIL LINES AND THE TRAINS WERE ALWAYS ON TIME AND CLEAN.  THOSE WERE THE DAYS – Kudos to the BBC for recounting the tale of Tama the cat who became the stationmaster at Kishi Station on the Kishigawa railway and helped save the line from downsizing by increasing tourism and ridership during the line’s troubled times in 2006 and 2007.  Tama has passed away, but is still highly regarded and even has a shrine that has elevated her to Goddess level in the region.  The line still has cats as stationmasters and, thanks to other tourist friendly upgrades, the Kishigawa line has survived and even increased its ridership.  So go check out the story of Tama and the cat stationmasters to motivate you to do more with your life.  If a cat can become a successful railway employee with its own shrine, there’s no excuse for everybody else.  (bbc.com)

 

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