Simple Minded Weekly Recap-ITATION! – 09/07/2018

PASO DEL NORTE-CENTRIC NEWS

IT TURNS OUT ONE OF THE NEGATIVES OF INSTALLING ARTIFICIAL TURF IN POORLY SECURED AREAS IS THAT IDIOTS CAN CAUSE HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS IN DAMAGE THAT IS NOT EASILY REPAIRED.  IF EPISD WOULD HAVE JUST INSTALLED REGULAR GRASS AT BOWIE, THE VANDALIZED FIELD COULD HAVE BEEN FIXED WITH SOME DIRT AND $5 OF GRASS – After spending hundreds of thousands of dollars to install spiffy artificial turf at Bowie High School Stadium, the field was severely damaged when 4 idiot teens drove their car onto the field to do donuts and then proceeded to vandalize other parts of the stadium.  The idiots were caught but, because laws don’t work and the idiots were minors, they will most likely get off with a slap on the wrist and taxpayers will be on the hook for the full cost of repairs.  Right about now I bet EPISD is wishing they didn’t waste all that money on artificial turf at Bowie without making sure that there was adequate barriers in place to prevent random vehicles from getting on the field.  That’s why you can’t have nice things, Bowie.  (cbs4local.com)

ONCE UPON A TIME, NMSU WANTED TO INCREASE ENROLLMENT SO THEY STARTED HANDING OUT A BUNCH OF SCHOLARSHIPS.  THE PLAN WORKED A LITTLE TOO WELL AND NOW NMSU HAS A BUDGET DEFICIT BECAUSE OF THE SCHEME.  OOPS! – NMSU has announced that they have a deficit in the $5 million range because of all the scholarships they have been giving out over the past few years.  For some ungodly reason NMSU included their scholarship students in their planned revenue stream, which is like including ghosts in the revenue stream.  Teachers are getting paid, no matter what, whether there is 1 student or 50.  So they can just stuff all the scholarship students and ghosts in the classrooms without spending an extra dime.  Just don’t count them in planned revenue and, VOILA, you don’t have a budget deficit.  So with that problem solved, keep on giving out scholarships like Halloween candy, NMSU.  Hell, if you start giving scholarships to cows and farm animals you can be considered visionary.  (cbs4local.com)

BILLY ABRAHAM IS IN JAIL AGAIN.  LOOKS LIKE ABRAHAM’S PAST IS OUT TO BITE HIM IN THE ASS – When you live your life in an antagonistic manner and do things without a care for consequences, eventually your actions catch up to you.  Or when your loaded and connected lawyer father dies, there’s no one left to cover your ass.  Either way, it looks like Billy Abraham is in trouble again and there is no one else to blame but himself.   The latest arrest comes from last year’s “elevator incident” in which Billy Abraham brazenly tried to manipulate and bribe witnesses in his attempts to change the inspection and operation dates on an unsafe elevator in one of his buildings that should not have been in service.  The government went after him for the elevator and he thought he could pull a fast one by dicking around with the inspection certificate.  Next time on the Billy Abraham legal soap opera:  bankruptcy court and a possible final partitioning of his property empire.  Stay tuned.  (elpasoinc.com)

REST OF THE WORLD-CENTRIC NEWS

ALTHOUGH THE ECONOMIC CLUSTERFUCK IN VENEZUELA AND ARGENTINA HAS NOT YET SPREAD TO BRAZIL, THEY ARE KEEPING BUSY WITH THEIR OWN CLUSTERFUCK THAT SAW THEIR NATIONAL MUSEUM GO UP IN FLAMES AND A PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE GET STABBED DURING A CAMPAIGN STOP.  SO JUST ANOTHER WEEK IN BRAZIL – Last weekend, the National Museum in Rio caught fire and virtually all of its contents were lost.  The museum didn’t have a sprinkler system and the people in the country see this as an example of an incompetent government choked by corruption.  The anger of the people in Brazil is palpable and upcoming elections in October are stirring up strong emotions.  A few days ago, one of the front runners for the presidency was stabbed during a campaign stop and almost died.  Granted, Jair Bolsonaro is a right-wing, hate-filled nut job.  But no candidate should be in danger in any advanced democracy.  On the bright side, Brazil’s economy isn’t as crappy as Venezuela or Argentina.  So they’ve got that going for them …….. for now.  (reuters.com)

BURT REYNOLDS IS DOING CRAZY TRANS-AM STUNTS WITH JESUS AT THIS VERY MOMENT.  LONG LIVE BURT REYNOLDS – Some sad news this week as legendary actor Burt Reynolds passed away at the age of 82.  Burt Reynolds will be known for his amazing acting career that included such classics as Deliverance, Smokey and the Bandit and Boogie Nights.  His career ranged from every genre imaginable and he made an impact on both the large and small screen.  Burt Reynolds always had a smile on his face and it seems he had a lot of fun and enjoyed life to the fullest.  Rest in peace, Burt Reynolds.  (bbc.com)

ALTHOUGH THE HURRICANE SEASON STARTED OFF SLOW, IT’S LOOKING TO MAKE UP FOR LOST TIME WITH 3 POSSIBLE HURRICANES IN THE ATLANTIC AND MORE IN THE PACIFIC – Hurricane Florence is the big monster currently lurking in the Atlantic with its eyes set on the Carolinas.  But there are other storms taking aim at American territory on both sides of the globe.  By this time next week we might have major storms making impact from Guam to Hawaii to the Virgin Islands to the Carolinas.  Although the hurricane season started off slow, it looks like it’s coming on with a vengeance during the peak of the season.  Be careful out there.  (tbo.com)

 

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