Simple Minded Daily Recap-ITATION! – 01/19/2018


A ROUND OF APPLAUSE FOR THE EL PASO COUNTY SHERIFF’S DEPARTMENT, THE ONLY EL PASO COUNTY GOVERNMENT ENTITY THAT ISN’T PERPETUALLY DOING SOMETHING STUPID – The El Paso County Sheriff’s department has revealed crime statistics from 2017 and they show that crime throughout the county has dropped by 26% compared to 2016.  The crime has dropped in both violent and property categories and this follows a trend that has occurred since Sheriff Richard Wiles took over the department a few years back.  We joke a lot about Wiles and his quirks, but he gets the job done and has always helped keep crime down and increase awareness in the community.  And he’s light years beyond the wacko sheriff in Dona Ana County.  So we salute you Sheriff Wiles and El Paso County law enforcement, you’re doing a great job and have not shot any innocent civilians like some of the other law enforcement outfits in the country.  (

LOOKS LIKE BILLY ABRAHAM IS GOING TO LOOSE HIS DOWNTOWN PROPERTIES SOONER THAN WE THOUGHT – Even as Billy Abraham is trying to keep the Toltec Building from creditors, ten more of his properties are now on the auction block in an attempt to raise funds to cover Abraham’s debts.  This really looks like the end of Billy Abraham’s dilapidated downtown empire.  It’s going to take a hell of a lot of legal wrangling to keep them from selling his buildings and he probably doesn’t have the means to cover the $1,000,000 Juan Gabriel concert judgment that is the main force speeding up this sale.  He could borrow the money to save his properties, but at this point it’s not apparent that there is anybody left that is stupid enough to lend him money.  Even if this all goes through, he’ll still have a few properties including the American Furniture building in Downtown El Paso.  But with all the financial buzzards circling around you have to wonder at what point will Billy Abraham be stable enough to renovate any one of his buildings and get some rent money that won’t be taken up in a future court case.  Is this the end of Billy?  (

THE EL PASO INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT LIZARDS ARE OFFICIALLY AN ENDANGERED SPECIES – The carpeting at the El Paso Airport has long been one of the more unique decorations found in any airport around the world.  Love it or hate it, the “lizard carpet” has achieved an almost cult-like status in the decades that it has been a staple in El Paso International Airport.  But alas, all good things must come to an end and the airport’s renovation plans include a phasing out of the iconic lizard design by mid-2018.  There’s some good news in that pieces of the carpeting  will be given out to people that want a piece of history, but it still sucks to see it gone forever at the airport.  Farewell, Airport Lizards.  (


CAPE TOWN IS ON THE VERGE OF BECOMING THE FIRST MAJOR CITY IN THE WORLD TO RUN OUT OF WATER.  THAT’S USUALLY WHAT YOU GET WHEN YOU COMBINE A MISMANAGED GOVERNMENT WITH A CRAPPY ECONOMY – As a result of a prolonged drought and an even longer streak of governmental incompetence, Cape Town in South Africa is on the verge of running out water by mid April.  Mandatory water usage caps have been placed throughout the city as the government struggles to fix a mess that they should have been planning against for years.  It’s right next to the ocean, so desalination plants are an option – but desalination plants don’t grow on trees and won’t be online anywhere near the April deadline.   (

TO ALL THE PEOPLE IN HAWAII WHO JUST HAD A HEARTATTACK, HAWAII’S EMERGENCY MANAGEMENT DEPARTMENT WOULD LIKE TO APOLIGIZE FOR THE FALSE ALARM.  WHOOPS – A ballistic missile threat false alarm was sent out in Hawaii last Saturday and it took over 30 minutes for the authorities to let everyone know it was an accident.  The situation was made worse by the fact that the alarm said it was not a test and it was the real thing.  So if you had a cell or were watching TV in Hawaii last Saturday you probably thought you were going to die and maybe did some stupid things in your “final moments” on Earth.  Although many people thought the system was hacked, it turns out that human error in a shift change led to the false alarm.  That employee was re-assigned because it’s practically impossible to be fired from a government job unless you kill someone and/or cuss out your superiors.  (

PHOENIX HAD NOT ONE, BUT TWO, SERIAL KILLERS IN 2017.  THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD BE ISSUING A TRAVEL WARNING ABOUT ARIZONA ANY MINUTE NOW – Cleophus Cooksey Jr. was arrested last month for murdering his parents, and after tracing his gun, they discovered that he was responsible for 7 other murders (possibly more) in the Phoenix area last year.  The Phoenix Police Department was quoted as saying, “To solve nine homicides in a period of three weeks is outstanding”.  No Phoenix PD, to NOT have nine homicides in a period of three weeks would be outstanding.  Solving nine homicides in three weeks is just sad, especially for a major American city not named Chicago, Detroit or Baltimore.  Talk about having a lack of tact.  (


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