Simple Minded Weekly Recap-ITATION! – 07/14/2017

PASO DEL NORTE-CENTRIC NEWS

TOM DIAMOND IS DEAD.  LONG LIVE TOM DIAMOND – Thomas “Tom” Mulford Diamond was a local lawyer who was a great force in the local Democratic party and who is best remembered as being the person who was most instrumental in getting federal recognition for the Tigua Tribe and helping them secure their lands.  Tom Diamond passed away on July 8 and he will be greatly missed.  He led an amazing life and did incredible things for El Paso and the surrounding region.  Tom Diamond was one of the most significant figures in the Paso del Norte region during the 20th Century, yet the local media spent more time covering the cheese at Chico’s Tacos than they did covering this great man and his life.  But we won’t forget his legacy.  Rest in peace, Mr. Diamond.  (legacy.com)

JUST A SAD REMINDER THAT EL PASO COULD HAVE HAD A COMPETITIVE UTILITY MARKET, BUT LONG AGO CITY COUNCIL VOTED IDIOTICALLY TO STICK WITH A MONOPOLY FOR ELECTRICITY AND ALL OTHER UTILITIES – Yup, El Paso could have had competition for electricity but instead chose to let a monopoly control everything.  El Paso Electric isn’t even a public utility and the city still allowed them to be the only game in town.  There is still a chance for El Paso to have a logical competitive market, but all levels in the government would have to competently come together and work towards one unified goal.  So basically El Paso is getting a competitive market once hell freezes over.  (elpasoproud.com)

IF THE CHUCK DEBRODER BURGER DOESN’T COME WITH A RANDOM SHOT OF ALCOHOL I’M GOING TO BE SEVERELY DISAPPOINTED – Chuck DeBroder is a local celebrity and one of El Paso’s most legendary weathermen.  Now the KTSM meteorologist will be cemented in history with his own burger at Downtown’s International Bar/Club/Bistro/Café/Thingy.  The burger is a vegetarian creation complete with a veggie patty and a Portobello mushroom.  I’m not a vegetarian, but the burger sounds good and it seems like it’s worth a try.  Now if they can also create a Chuck DeBroder cocktail we’re all set.  (elpasoproud.com)

REST OF THE WORLD-CENTRIC NEWS

IT’S ALMOST AS IF PHILADELPHIA SAW CENTRAL AMERICA’S SEVERE DRUG CRIME EPIDEMIC  AND WANTED TO SHOW THEM THEY COULD DO BETTER – A spoiled brat, rich boy in Philadelphia decided to play the role of “bad ass drug kingpin” and ended up murdering 4 of his acquaintances while spectacularly failing in trying to hide the bodies.  So just a typical weekday afternoon in Philadelphia.  After a week long search for 4 missing men, Cosmo DiNardo confessed to killing them because of some stupid reason involving a drug deal gone bad.  The story is equal parts creepy, sad and pathetic and is a tragic reflection on this idiot’s family and the perverse sense of entitlement they fostered in him.  For one week, Philadelphia made most of the cities in Mexico look nice and peaceful.  Yet Philadelphia still looked calm compared to Chicago.  (philly.com)

DARPA IS LOOKING INTO CYBORGS NOW.  SO EXPECT FULL CYBORG CONSUMER TECHNOLOGY TO START HITTING THE SHELVES IN 30 YEARS FOLLOWED BY A MASSIVE UPRISING OF HALF-HUMAN/HALF-MACHINE HIPSTER APPLE ZOMBIES – The Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency, or DARPA, is a government organization that has influenced research and had a massive impact on most major computer, communication, defense and transportation innovations that have occurred over the past few decades.  From the internet to GPS to cellular communication – DARPA has pretty much had a hand in anything even remotely related to technology.  DARPA recently gave out $65 million to multiple teams to advance the field of neural engineering and create neural implants that can be used to control technology, among other things.  When DARPA starts something it doesn’t dick around, so expect low cost cyborgs to become a reality sometime in the middle of the 21st century.  Assimilate into the manmachine movement or die!  (blogs.discovermagazine.com)

IT TURNS OUT DONALD TRUMP JR. IS JUST AS STUPID AND INCOMPETENT AS HIS FATHER – Much like a cartoon character who repeatedly steps on a rake to hilarious results, Donald Trump Jr. has been strung along hilariously by the media this week as he continues to back track and change his story over meetings he had with Russian officials during the campaign.  First Donald Trump Jr. denied ever meeting with any Russians, then after the media offered proof, he said he only met with non-government affiliated Russians, then after the media offered proof, he said that they didn’t talk about Hillary Clinton, then the media offered proof and the cycle repeated itself for the better part of the week.  So either Donald Trump Jr. is hiding something or he’s just a complete, fucking moron like his father – or maybe it’s both!  Working with a foreign government to undermine American rules is tantamount to treason but that doesn’t seem to bother the Donald Trump team one bit as long as they can accomplish their goal of running the country into the ground.  (bbc.com)

 

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